Wednesday, May 10, 2006

I'm back to blogging again, this would be my 3rd blog. Btw I'm also known as tiniwini and snowcookie, well just to inform you if ever you happen to visit or drop by my other blogs here in blogger. I also use in blogdrive the nickname tinipaxxy, a portmanteau of my name and my bf's. I've stopped blogging due to lack of time for it, been too busy with my acads and my bf. Now it's summer, no acads and my boyfriend's away so I've got tons of time to waste this summer vacation.
My boyfriend Pax and I are currently not in good terms. I'm cold, bitter and mean with him since last week. I don't know why... I'm always like this everytime he does something that disappoints me. And I feel bad that he's undisturbed with my attitude. He replies as if we were okay. We never had the time to talk about it since I never opened to him. Last week he went to Bulacan, to his uncle's house to start working. He was there from Thursday to Saturday, I was glad he came home to QC even if it was against his father's will. When he came home I've made some plans since we've got so little time til he goes back to Bulacan. But most of his time were wasted; he wasn't able to upload some text animation tutorial he made which I was eager to view, and we never get to have a long talk over the phone since he was staying at his aunt or uncle's house to hide from his Dad. I was mad at him and he ignores it, the thing that angers me more.
To think it was our 7th monthsary yesterday, all we had was a simple greeting through text. "Happy 7th monthsary" and "I love you" were the words I recieved. My response? "Happy 7th monthsary" and "ganun din". I usually utter ganun din over the phone every time he mentions the world's sweetest line and I couldn't since my parents might hear me saying it. I also use it every time I wanna joke or upset him every time we argue. I know how much he loves to hear those three sweet words from me...and here I am saying other words instead on our monthsary. I don't wanna fake my feelings, I really don't feel like saying it coz I'm unhappy. I admit I'm such a cry baby who often cries over shallow matters but I never cried this time. I think the problem's with me... he told me to tell him whatever I feel and pretends not to know me well. But I choose to leave it this way, I want him to find it out himself. Am I mean? I don't think I am. It's natural for a girl to feel this way specially if her guy's apathetic with her feelings...